Somewhere in early adulthood, we need to learn to unlearn.

Some of the knowledge and information that we have accumulated while living as children and teenagers must be expelled before it becomes a major hindrance in the rest of our life journey.

Unlearning is as crucial as learning and relearning. Unlearning is undeniably an important part of our personal growth. Sadly, we rarely have mentors, teachers, institutions, or gurus to help us go through this process. Many of us don’t even have an idea of how important it is to discard the stuff that we once held close to us and affectionately blended into our personality.

What to unlearn?

Those things that were once useful, or that we thought were useful, but have lost their significance or were never significant in the first place must be discarded here and now. This includes the beliefs, assumptions, and ideas we grew up accepting as truth without ever questioning them for ourselves.

The better question would be, how do we know what to unlearn?

The answer is a lot more difficult. The only way we can figure that out is by, first of all, becoming better observers of ourselves and the world we live in, and then asking better questions about them.

Secondly, putting effort into the pursuit of better answers to those questions.

Finally, not becoming fearful of uncertainty, confusion, or a lack of answers.

The last one is very important because when our pursuit doesn’t yield results, we succumb to settling for the most convincing answer we find. That gives us a feeling of certainty but, again, fogs our view of reality.

How to unlearn?

Observation. Questioning. Pursuit of Knowledge. Deliberate Practice.

Learning new stuff takes our effort and commitment, relearning makes us irritated and sometimes bored, but unlearning is the most painful of them all, as it is like self-destructing and stripping away layers from our body (metaphorically). It takes a lot of humility and patience, and deprives us of a sense of comfort. It feels like a threat to us, as if we are pointing a gun at ourselves. But, it is much needed.